Social anxiety is not just 'being shy'...

I've had this blog in mind for a while, but never quite managed to structure it quite right. Hopefully, this will give some of you that aren't so aware an insight to what Social anxiety actually is and maybe how to help people deal with it.

It's very easy to miss the signs of social anxiety in a person, or dismiss anything that you can see as them just being shy. With friends who suffer from social anxiety disorder I understand how difficult it is for them to do every day things like going to the shops or sitting in a classroom. I also understand how hard it is when people just think they're being antisocial or rude when they choose not to go out or be a part of the group. Social anxiety isn't just feeling a little bit nervous around people, it can be an intense and overwhelming fear over the most every day occurrences that make life hard. People affected by it might also fear doing or saying something humiliating in public. Social anxiety can disrupt normal life in various ways. Relationships between people can be difficult to establish and in some cases between friends they can be strained. It can be hard to concentrate at school or work for fear of doing something embarrassing or feeling uncomfortable with the number and proximity of the people around you.

The signs of social anxiety include low self esteem, dreading every day activities such as working or even speaking on the phone, fear of criticism and avoiding eye contact with others. In many cases, a sufferer can feel like they're going crazy or feel like people are constantly looking at them. Substance abuse is common with those desperate to eradicate any sign of nervousness. Panic attacks are also a symptom of Social anxiety, people can be so overwhelmed and scared in social situations that their emotions build up. They can also have physical symptoms like sweating, nausea and heart palpitations. People with social anxiety can often suffer with other mental illnesses like Depression, GAD (Generalised Anxiety Disorder), or PTS (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder). Fortunately, there are a lot of ways to help people who suffer with social anxiety, including CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy), supported self help, antidepressants and psychotherapy.

It can be really easy for people who don't know the signs of social anxiety to say things that are hurtful without realising. Sufferers don't want to hear 'What do YOU have to worry about?' and 'Stop being weird', because it's hard enough for them to come to terms with let alone trying to explain to other people. People who don't understand what social anxiety is can say, 'Pull yourself together or you'll look like an idiot' which just makes the sufferer feel worse. Possibly the worst thing that can be said is 'It's all in your head'. Yes, it's a mental illness. Yes, it's in your head and it's not physical, but that doesn't mean it isn't there. It doesn't mean it doesn't hurt people. Saying that is like implying that the illness doesn't even exist or isn't important, which is just plain ridiculous. I can't stress this point enough, MENTAL ILLNESS MATTERS. Ignore the people who say otherwise, they clearly don't have a clue.